Last night, I slept at 7:30P.M. It was too early with the usual time I slept the past few weeks and days which took me awake until 12mn until 3 in the morning(sometimes during school days and even weekends).
Then, at the midst of the night. I dreamed of my boyfriend(Rainuel Carlo). Honestly, I dreamed of him many times already, and sometimes consecutive 3 nights. But last night was different. It was somewhat a bad dream. :( It was like this......
I dreamed that...
He went here on our home(which he had really planned). Of course, I was so happy that he really did his promise to me. I let him stayed in my granny's house--at my cousin's(Kuya Daboy) room specifically. He saw what was my real situation at home. He saw me taking care of my niece--Baby Kaycee. I made her milk. I carried her then sang her song until she fell to sleep. I cleaned the house and he also helped(which was a good thing for me(smiled). He understood why most of the time, I wasn't able to text him--it was because I was too busy at home--with my family and studies.
I couldn't explain well why the ambiance of our place in my dream was dark. It seemed like a lonely place.
Let's go back to the story telling...
One night(on my dream), I went to my granny's house to see him but my cousin told me he went to my neighbor's house somewhere up on our place. So i went to the roadside to have a look where I could possibly see him. Then I heard music and saw disco lights not far from where I stood. I wanted to go there to fetch him since he doesn't familiarize our place but the sky was soo dark that caused me not to go but it made me worried of him.
The next morning, at 9 AM. I looked for him on my granny's house again to have a conversation with him. But I was told that he went with Kuya Daboy somewhere out. I don't know where they went. I felt sadness because I must be the one to tour him around(as a sort of bonding together). I thought maybe kuya toured him to the beautiful scenic place in our barangay. I remembered that I once told him about the view of the vast ricefield from a certain place here where the sea is soo obviously seen surrounded by the mountains of Caramoan Penninsula(which I really love to see and I wanna share to him how I really appreciate the place).I wanted to make time for him but it seemed so impossible. Yea, we might be at same place and near with one another on my dream--but why it seemed soo different? :((
On the afternoon of same day, I was on the roadside with an umbrella on my right hand. I asked again my cousin where is Carlo. Then, he told me that he was bicycling around our barangay WITH ANOTHER GIRL. They jammed together. Oh goodness! that made me soo mad! X/ Kuya told me that the girl with him was one of our neighborhoods. errr!!
So, I waited there on the roadside until I saw them with my very eyes. I saw the girl riding on a bicycle then Carlo on another bicycle. Carlo was behind her while busy pushing the pedal going up. But still I saw him smiling. He wore a blue jacket, white shorts, and rubber shoes. I really, really felt bad about it. And so, I slowly turned my head back. When I had a look at him, he saw how was my facial expression---frowned forehead, closed fists cause of anger, and confused eyes--still in disbelief on what my very eyes saw. When he turned the bicycle on the another way, he had just a look at me..then IGNORED ME. I turned my head back again with aching heart. I heard the brake on his ride on my back--sound that made me think he stopped the bicylce. I turned again but saw NO ONE behind me. No one running behind to pull my hand and face him. No one said sorry for what I saw. No one hugged me on the back..No one.. He just stopped but didn't get out of it to run after me. But rather, he put on his feet on the pedal, continued to move it, riding around..:(( I also heard that he hated staying with us and he wanted to go home in Pasig. He even made fight with my other cousin.
It was soo painful that awakened me at 3AM. It was soo heavy bearing it. It was not the Rainuel Carlo I knew and loved before. I decided to fall asleep though I felt so hard. Until, I finally lost my conciousness then fell to sleep.
I slept at mt granny's house(which at reality I really do--on my uncle's room--alone). Then, I decided to have a look on my cousin's room. I opened the door and saw my cousin soundly aslept. I turned my head to Carlo and saw him chilling from cold. I got worried and went back to my room to get my blanket then got back at my cousin'd room. I slowly put it on him, close around him to give him warm. Then, I saw him moved and he opened his eyes. I thought it was my turn after looong moment of waiting to make him near me. I asked him. "Kumusta ka na, baby? Sory nagising kita. Sige matulog ka na ulit." He answered nothing. I sat near his head and placed it on my lap. I touched his hair then sang him a love song. All I felt on that moment was---I wanted you near me, baby. Though pain was slowly killing me. Then he turned his head back facing toward me. What I saw was a real baby--a 1 year old baby. He talked to me and called me ATE BHEY. Oh my!
Finally, I woke up at 7:30 in the morning with heart breaking, with mind confusing and asking. Why was my dream like that? Why it was soo lonely? So painful having him near me? and soo different? I never think of that in reality that my situation will be like that whenever he'll be here. I never stop myself from crying while am alone in my room. I am starting to feel fear again. I am starting to think of many things. How is he going there in Baguio? How does he feel toward me at present? I never know...HOW SAD that dream made me.
I still believe that it depends upon the person. I don't know what's the reaction of my boyfriend toward this dream. It could be true or not(in some instances but not exactly as is). I trust him but I believe also that dreams have reasons. For my mysterious dream, I don't have the answer yet to all the questions running down my head. I'm soo bothered by this thought.
(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)
Then, at the midst of the night. I dreamed of my boyfriend(Rainuel Carlo). Honestly, I dreamed of him many times already, and sometimes consecutive 3 nights. But last night was different. It was somewhat a bad dream. :( It was like this......
I dreamed that...
He went here on our home(which he had really planned). Of course, I was so happy that he really did his promise to me. I let him stayed in my granny's house--at my cousin's(Kuya Daboy) room specifically. He saw what was my real situation at home. He saw me taking care of my niece--Baby Kaycee. I made her milk. I carried her then sang her song until she fell to sleep. I cleaned the house and he also helped(which was a good thing for me(smiled). He understood why most of the time, I wasn't able to text him--it was because I was too busy at home--with my family and studies.
I couldn't explain well why the ambiance of our place in my dream was dark. It seemed like a lonely place.
Let's go back to the story telling...
One night(on my dream), I went to my granny's house to see him but my cousin told me he went to my neighbor's house somewhere up on our place. So i went to the roadside to have a look where I could possibly see him. Then I heard music and saw disco lights not far from where I stood. I wanted to go there to fetch him since he doesn't familiarize our place but the sky was soo dark that caused me not to go but it made me worried of him.
The next morning, at 9 AM. I looked for him on my granny's house again to have a conversation with him. But I was told that he went with Kuya Daboy somewhere out. I don't know where they went. I felt sadness because I must be the one to tour him around(as a sort of bonding together). I thought maybe kuya toured him to the beautiful scenic place in our barangay. I remembered that I once told him about the view of the vast ricefield from a certain place here where the sea is soo obviously seen surrounded by the mountains of Caramoan Penninsula(which I really love to see and I wanna share to him how I really appreciate the place).I wanted to make time for him but it seemed so impossible. Yea, we might be at same place and near with one another on my dream--but why it seemed soo different? :((
On the afternoon of same day, I was on the roadside with an umbrella on my right hand. I asked again my cousin where is Carlo. Then, he told me that he was bicycling around our barangay WITH ANOTHER GIRL. They jammed together. Oh goodness! that made me soo mad! X/ Kuya told me that the girl with him was one of our neighborhoods. errr!!
So, I waited there on the roadside until I saw them with my very eyes. I saw the girl riding on a bicycle then Carlo on another bicycle. Carlo was behind her while busy pushing the pedal going up. But still I saw him smiling. He wore a blue jacket, white shorts, and rubber shoes. I really, really felt bad about it. And so, I slowly turned my head back. When I had a look at him, he saw how was my facial expression---frowned forehead, closed fists cause of anger, and confused eyes--still in disbelief on what my very eyes saw. When he turned the bicycle on the another way, he had just a look at me..then IGNORED ME. I turned my head back again with aching heart. I heard the brake on his ride on my back--sound that made me think he stopped the bicylce. I turned again but saw NO ONE behind me. No one running behind to pull my hand and face him. No one said sorry for what I saw. No one hugged me on the back..No one.. He just stopped but didn't get out of it to run after me. But rather, he put on his feet on the pedal, continued to move it, riding around..:(( I also heard that he hated staying with us and he wanted to go home in Pasig. He even made fight with my other cousin.
It was soo painful that awakened me at 3AM. It was soo heavy bearing it. It was not the Rainuel Carlo I knew and loved before. I decided to fall asleep though I felt so hard. Until, I finally lost my conciousness then fell to sleep.
I slept at mt granny's house(which at reality I really do--on my uncle's room--alone). Then, I decided to have a look on my cousin's room. I opened the door and saw my cousin soundly aslept. I turned my head to Carlo and saw him chilling from cold. I got worried and went back to my room to get my blanket then got back at my cousin'd room. I slowly put it on him, close around him to give him warm. Then, I saw him moved and he opened his eyes. I thought it was my turn after looong moment of waiting to make him near me. I asked him. "Kumusta ka na, baby? Sory nagising kita. Sige matulog ka na ulit." He answered nothing. I sat near his head and placed it on my lap. I touched his hair then sang him a love song. All I felt on that moment was---I wanted you near me, baby. Though pain was slowly killing me. Then he turned his head back facing toward me. What I saw was a real baby--a 1 year old baby. He talked to me and called me ATE BHEY. Oh my!
Finally, I woke up at 7:30 in the morning with heart breaking, with mind confusing and asking. Why was my dream like that? Why it was soo lonely? So painful having him near me? and soo different? I never think of that in reality that my situation will be like that whenever he'll be here. I never stop myself from crying while am alone in my room. I am starting to feel fear again. I am starting to think of many things. How is he going there in Baguio? How does he feel toward me at present? I never know...HOW SAD that dream made me.
I still believe that it depends upon the person. I don't know what's the reaction of my boyfriend toward this dream. It could be true or not(in some instances but not exactly as is). I trust him but I believe also that dreams have reasons. For my mysterious dream, I don't have the answer yet to all the questions running down my head. I'm soo bothered by this thought.
(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)(sad)
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